I’ve been working on my daughter’s financial aid paperwork this weekend.

It seems so much more complicated than when I went to college, 30 years ago. I went into the Financial Aid office at my University and signed some paperwork. I think they had me give the T’s & C’s a cursory look-over and that was it. I signed and dated the form and they usually had a small check for me.

Taxes and college

I’ve been working on the FAFSA and taxes simultaneously. You can submit the FAFSA on January 1st, with estimated numbers. I submitted a form with estimated numbers once we got our W-2s. Now that the old 1040 is almost complete, I have more accurate numbers.

This weekend I was determined to get the taxes done enough to update the FAFSA and hope we would get more aid. Probably not going to happen. Mission accomplished.

My daughter has been accepted to a few colleges. One of them had a Master Promissory Note for “her” to fill out. The Government also requires her to go through a lengthy “Counseling Interview”. This is pages and pages where they ask about your college expenses and sources of funds. They ask what you think you will earn when you graduate and have a lot of good information on interest rates, repayment and things that anyone who takes out a loan should know.

The problem is that even I had a hard time going through the form. How is a 17-year old supposed to do it? I know their goal is to inform them and make them aware of what they are getting into. But my god, if I struggle with it, how is my kid supposed to get through the form and become informed?

College recruiting

There seems to be a new trend in college recruiting. In the old days we would apply to two or three colleges: a safety school, a stretch and the school we wanted to go to. Today kids apply to five or more colleges. I’ve heard of kids applying to 15 or more! It’s so much easier now that everything is on-line. You just need Mom or Dad’s credit card. Easy.

The problem is that when kids apply to 10 colleges, they can still only attend one. So while a kid may get accepted to five colleges, the colleges know that a large number of accepted students will not accept their offers. Some may accept, pay the deposit and still not show up in the fall.

There is also the game of getting more applicants but not increasing the number of seats available. If you get more applicants but accept the same number of students as last year, your college looks more selective, harder to get it to, more appealing. If you are more appealing than you can jack up your costs, which will further enhance your status. Tough to get into and EXPENSIVE! What’s not to love about that?

The barrage

We’ve been getting phone calls, emails and items in the mail since she took her first SATs. A few colleges called almost every day. Sent emails almost every day. For a while a few were hitting us every day, several times. It was ridiculous. They all thought she and their school were an ideal match.

Everyday I delete emails from these colleges that my daughter has no interest in. Many are good schools. Probably all of them are great schools in some regards. She’s done applying and the deadlines have passed, but they keep extending the deadlines. Got to get those numbers up, I guess.

Still, every time I delete one of those emails I feel like I’m closing a door on an opportunity for my daughter. We never know how the school we choose will affect and direct our lives. A professor can change your life. The love of your life can change your life. A crappy program can change your life. You just never know.

Looking back over the years, I now know how important a careful consideration of your choices are. We never discussed options when I was applying for college. My parents had not attended college and the game was totally outside of their consciousness. Today, I am aware of the importance of these decisions, but a teen ager is not so much.

So while I feel these doors closing, my daughter is on her trajectory. It is hers. Her choices will have a bigger impact on her life than my choices for her, moving forward. I have to gently advise and step back. I have to facilitate but not dictate.

Live well my friends!

Andy

© 2014 anagelin